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Mila Hermanovski Blog

Aliens, Dolphins, and Unicorns, Oh My!

By laurareineke Fri., Aug. 2, 2013 ,10:58 am EDT

The good news is that the first episode was not this season's sole "unconventional" challenge. This is the REAL deal. There are only so many things they can think of, I suppose; however, as Tim was delivering the details of the challenge, this one seemed particularly wackadoo. Frozen Yoplait? Coney Island? Carnival toys? Teams? I dunno...seems kinda destined for disaster....and it was! I mean how many decent things are there to really make something fabulous and chic out of within the realm of Coney Island prizes? Apparently, the majority of them are either blue vinyl or green vinyl. The designers' GoBanks are docked $100 as an allowance to play all the games. Translation: Luna Park required $1400 as a stipend.

Also, I've been wondering for a long time why "Project Runway" doesn't have individual challenge prizes, like "Top Chef" does for example. All it would take would be a company/product (like Yoplait!) to sponsor the challenge, get free advertising, and then up the ante of the challenge by awarding the winner a cash prize. Come on, we starving fashion designers would be over the moon for even $1000. When I heard the Yoplait representative speaking, and then the fact that the designers had to hand out samples of the new frozen yogurt product to promote it, and moreover ask the tasters for "descriptives" which are then meant to serve as inspiration for their designs, not only did I wonder if I was watching "Top Chef" for a minute, but also thought surely there would be a prize for such product placement. Alas, not even a year's supply of yogurt. I hope there was some at craft service at least!

Interesting team pairings, producers. Shocker that Timothy and Miranda are paired together. And Sandro and Sue: you couldn't choose two people with more polarized personalities and work styles. But then Helen and Kate seem like a match made in heaven since both their fortés are gowns. It's no surprise that there's plenty of drama in the workroom. I don't even know where to begin with Timothy and Miranda. Both of them seem a bit...unstable...and though I'm sure I'd want to beat the crap out of Timothy as well, there was no excuse for Miranda's immature smack talk and despicable mean-girl behavior. And then when she realized she was being such an a-hole and tearfully apologized to Timothy, whom she had driven to evacuate the workroom clutching his giant stuffed unicorn, she wanted to HUG IT OUT. Timothy's expression was priceless. And so was his sitting in a dark corner in the stairwell with Unicorn, reading the pep-talk letter from his model, which gave him the strength to carry on. Reality TV gold there. I did laugh out loud, even in my current stressed-out and sleep-deprived state, so thanks for that.

The runway was generally an explosion of icky vinyl and half-assed kitsch. There was a very clear winning design, and the rest were pretty much losers.

Bradon + Karen: While I appreciate the "out of the box" thinking here, the tumor-like appendages are gross, and this overall looks too costumey and not avant-garde. It does, however, fit well. And for those positives, the pair are safe.

Dom + Alexandria: As the judges said, this look makes anyone smile, which is great. But I think the only reason it was in the top is because there were so many bad entries, none of which were worthy of much praise. Why else would there only be TWO top teams? They made an adorable piece that someone (albeit only a Tokyo-Pop girl, a 12 year-old, or a raver) would actually wear, and virtually no one else did. And why didn't Heidi comment this week that it seemed to lack a bottom half?

Sandro + Sue: There is one of these looks in every unconventional challenge. It's just a boring silhouette with no signature. The skirt fabrication and hem makes it look sloppy and droopy. And the material itself isn't helping: Who wants to wear something that looks like it was made of blue vinyl shower curtains? The judges decided they were safe, though, which is good for Sue since she merely served as Sandro's slave.

Helen + Kate: Hands-down the only attractive entry this week. They were smart to choose the red straw hats, which were a really nice color. I'm sure the judges thought what I did when they saw it: "Thank God it isnʼt vinyl!" Aside from that factor, which made it stand out that much more, this chic little dress was well constructed, fashionable, and a clever use of materials. I could see it worn by any number of starlets to an event.

Alexander + Justin: Looks like a goth girl had to dress as a sea creature for Halloween. This needed a major editing eye. It was loads better after the jacket was taken off, but even then it was just okay, and those hip appendages had to go. Then they just couldn't stop themselves and had to add pink shoes and matching pink eye shadow. Wackadoo at its finest.

Jeremy + Ken: More blue vinyl, but at least they made separates. Only thing is, the separates were completely disjointed from each other. It's almost as if someone colorblind got dressed. Who would really wear blue vinyl pants anyway?

Miranda + Timothy: Even Miranda couldn't explain who would wear this and where. Who wears vinyl to the beach? It reminded me of those costumes that come in a clear plastic bag. The colors don't work together, and the vest looks like a shredded afterthought. And with that it is the inevitable auf for Timothy. At least he got to take his unicorn mascot with him.

Quote of the week: "I'm gonna need f**kin' therapy after this!" - Miranda. You already need therapy, but we all did after "Project Runway!" Welcome to the club.