Is Your Life Like a Movie?

You roll over and fall out of bed, only to discover your true love sleeping on the floor.

You roll over and find a gigantic knife covered in … someone’s blood.

You roll over and weep into your pillow.

You roll over and jump out of bed to avoid the gunfire.

You roll over and hear a musical score playing underneath you.

A stroll through the creepiest haunted house in town

A night at a dance club, where all the dancers perform perfectly choreographed numbers

A night of deep, introspective philosophizing in a dark cafe

A carriage ride through Central Park, followed by a perfect first kiss, which will then be spoiled in a cute kind of way by your date’s ex-girlfriend

Dinner at a nice restaurant, which is interrupted when the couple at the table next to yours attack you with steak knives

A low-level administrative job in an office without windows

A member of the police force, CIA or FBI

A high-powered advertising exec, wedding planner, matchmaker or career bridesmaid

A paranormal investigator and/or psychic

Doesn’t really matter, as long as they don’t mind if I randomly burst into song

You accidentally bump the rear end of the car in front of you. The owner is a gorgeous, charming guy. He asks you for your insurance info and a date.

A police officer pulls you over, and a few minutes later, you’re trapped in a jail cell.

You pass the time by singing along to the song on the radio. Soon, every one in traffic is harmonizing

You abandon your car and hitchhike. The driver who gives you a ride may or may not turn out to be a serial killer.

You get tired of waiting for traffic to move. You jump out of your car, grab hold of a low-flying traffic helicopter and fly your way to freedom.

I have a spouse and a child. But man, is that kid spooky! Always talking to people who aren’t there and digging up secrets in our attic.

I’m a high-powered modern woman living in a big city. Who has time for a family?

I have an unhappy marriage, ungrateful kids, and a mother and father who don’t appreciate me.

A spouse and two kids, all of whom get taken hostage at least twice a month.

My mother’s a dancer. My father sings. My brother and sister are great comic relief.

You discover you’ve burned the pie you were trying to make for your office crush. Your neighbor calls the fire department, and a hunky yet sensitive fireman answers the call.

You can’t find anything burning, but you do discover the charred remains of a blanket that’s been hidden under the floorboards for years.

You discover your house is on fire. You get out in time, but all of your worldly possessions are lost to the fire.

You discover a tap-dancing man in your bedroom, who is dancing so frantically that smoke is flying from his shoes.

You take cover, pull your gun and locate the grenade that has been tossed into your apartment. You jump out your window and give chase to your attacker.

The party is crashed by a trained assassin who is targeting your politician uncle.

Your brother introduces you to his cute, quirky friend. At first, you fight like cats and dogs. But when he starts flirting with your cousin, you see him in a different light.

Your mother tells the family she’s gathered you together because she has a fatal disease.

You’re besieged by distant relatives who want to know when you’re getting married. As if that weren’t bad enough, their questions are posed in song.

You’re introduced to a cousin you’ve never met who has an affinity for butcher knives … and then, Grandma disappears.

“Fear Factor”

“American Idol”

“The Amazing Race”

“Extreme Makeover: Home Edition”

“The Bachelor”

What kind of a lullaby you’d like to hear tonight

How torn you are between the man you’re engaged to and the man of your dreams

Whether you left your spare handgun under your pillow or in the dresser

Why is there a man standing over your bed with an axe?

Running away from all your problems to Jamaica or some equally pretty (and faraway) country

Julia Roberts

Jennifer Hudson

Angelina Jolie

Naomi Watts

Sarah Michelle Gellar