Yee-haw, boys and girls, "Project Runway" is back! After a long, dark period I will only refer to as "the unpleasantness," "Project Runway" saddled up and moved on over to Lifetime seamlessly. What a joy to have all the regulars on hand for what is one of the best episodes of “PR” I have seen in a long time. Tim’s here! Yay! Heidi, looking beautiful while dishing out huge helpings of schadenfreude (delight at other people’s misfortune). Michael Kors, the ever-glowing tangerine God of Fashion, and Nina Garcia, now at Marie Claire and sharpening her claws on a new crop of diverse designers.

Let’s get this out of the way: Yes, it is filmed in Los Angeles ... but so far that doesn’t seem to have affected a thing; in fact, the first challenge is pretty fabulous because of L.A.: The designers are taken to the red carpet of the Emmys, and given the challenge of designing a red-carpet gown of their choice with two days and $200. All the familiar fun ensues that makes us addicted to this stuff — sketching in the workroom (now at FIDM and bigger than ours!), a half hour to shop at Mood (yay! Mood!), and let the drama begin. All under the lilting tones of a certain Mr. Gunn, whom we have sorely missed.

Meet the designers: Ra’mon (the serious med student); Logan (the guy’s guy, letting us know in no uncertain terms that he is straight); Johnny (former drug addict who tried out for the show several times, but made it now that he is clean. Read: drama); Gordana (Yugoslavian tough-chick who will win even if she has to make her dress out of potatoes and corn); Malvin (one word: Sanjaya); Qristyl (oooh honey, step back, cuz Miss Q doesn’t mess around with skinny girls, she is size “plus-sexy”); Shirin (sweet to the point of diabetic coma); Nicolas (the self-acclaimed “Feather Prince” — Good Luck); Mitchell (every show has one, the all-American cutie); Ari (techno-chick who’s tragically into “Blade Runner” Chic); Louise (trapped-in-vintage-land Louise Brooks channeler); Irina (into leathah); Carol (this season’s Kenley? Pixie-couture airhead); Epperson (serious dreads and seems to be the oldest of the bunch); Althea (Cocky with a capital “C,” sure she is the next Christian, Vivienne Westwood, McQueen, blah blah blah); and finally, Christopher (self-taught and second runner-up in the cutie category). We met Christopher last — any predictions?

Some workroom fun that was music to my ears: Ari saying “I don’t sketch” ... Johnny having a drug-free meltdown with Tim coming to save the day and dry his tears ... Mitchell may be our new cryer ... Malvin claiming his garments are “ineffable” and beyond description (Oh, I can describe them alright). The best moment of the show? Qristyl can’t find anyone to cut her fabric at Mood, so she buys a pair of scissors and CUTS IT HERSELF! Way to make it work, Miss Q! Reality-show gold!

The dresses are coming along, and there’s a joyous visit from Saint Tim (do I hear angels when he enters the workroom?), and we begin to see what these designers are all about. Johnny says he will use “spit and gum” to finish his hideous dress if he has to. Tim calls Christopher’s work a “cruise-line cocktail waitress,” Ari is tragically channeling Blayne by making a halter diaper dress and Mitchell is making some sort of Victorian caftan out of coffin lining. Miss Q has completely missed with her quasi–Carmen Miranda wedding dress, and on the morning of the runway show, Mitchell has to start over from scratch and decides to go for a Lady Godiva look and send his model down the runway nude.

Oh Rapture! The Runway! Another byproduct of the L.A. location ... Lindsay Lohan is the guest judge! Here come the dresses!

• Althea: Silver, pretty, nice and safe.
• Gordana: Short blue-green dress with origami floating device around the bust.
• Malvin: Beige burlap scaly ugly boring dress fit for a prison wedding.
• Mitchell: Sheer (butt cheeks on parade) caftan that would make a great maternity dress for JLo.
• Louise: Dress made of drapes with a flowered growth on the shoulder.
• Christopher: ’80s prom dress made of garbage bags and Kleenex.
• Ra’mon: Fabulous eggplant taffeta gown that you could see on the most fabulous star on the Oscars red carpet.
  Shirin: Cutesy, short, safe.
• Epperson: More purple, but this one is the wrong way to do it.
• Irina: Literally drapes that the model keeps tripping over.
• Ari: Ridiculous space suit that wouldn’t pass for fashion in any year in the future.
• Johnny: This tragedy looks like a piece of fabric blew onto the model in a windstorm and was held in place by pieces of chewing gum.
• Qristyl: Ouch. I love Q, but this is hideous. How hideous? Kenley would love it.
• Logan: Silver, boring and monotone like his voice.
• Nicolas: Short, black plastic/rubber body condom. No feathers, go figure.

 

The decisions are made, the delicious drama spills forth in classic PR fashion. Did I agree with their decisions on who they kept on the runway? Yes. But I seriously disagree with their commentary on the top and the bottom looks ... but that’s what makes the show addictive. You want to scream at Nina, pull Heidi’s hair out, wipe the orange off of Michael Kors, and force-feed Lindsay Lohan. We all agreed Miss Q was a wreck, but she’s too fun to get rid of: In. Johnny: In. Are you serious? This same dress has gotten many designers eliminated, but they obviously keep him for what they hope will be more drug-free drama. Ra’mon: In. They called this dress “safe,” even though it was obviously the most beautifully realized piece on the show. Mitchell: In. They gave him a break. Plus they know all the gay men watching the show would be mad if they eliminate the cutest designer. Ari: OUT. What glee to hear Michael Kors call this ugly piece of garbage a “disco soccer ball.” I am swooning with delight. The winner? Christopher. Oh my God. This dress is one pair of fingerless gloves away from the prom scene in any John Hughes movie. (See photo.)They would normally rake this thing over the coals, but to keep us talking about the controversy, they chose to reward the self-taught naive boy who now thinks he’s got a shot at winning. But that’s why we love the show. “Project Runway” is back in all its glory. We can’t get enough of the delicious punishment, drama, hopes and dashed dreams of “Project Runway.”

And, ultimately, of life. See ya soon, Chris

It’s time for ye olde team challenge again, and we’re finally beginning to realize ... that no one wants to work with Mila this season. Did you see the look of panic on their faces when Tim was assigning team members? It was like a scene from “Mean Girls.” Maybe they don’t like color blocking. Maybe they think that one girl with a dark bob haircut is one too many. Whatever the reason is, I don’t really understand it, because she hasn’t really done anything to warrant that much video-confessional whining.

Never mind, because Seth Aaron and Emilio are sittin’ in a tree! S-E-W-I-N-G! Somewhere in a vault, on a tape labeled “Bromance,” there is slow-motion footage of these two at Parsons, skipping through yards of dark denim together, culminating in a high-five. Never in the history of “Runway” has a team ever taken that much joy in a pairing — and it showed. Not only because they took home the win, but also because they made show history with the first double win for both designers.

In other news, I really wish Team Amy and Jonathan had watched an episode or two of “Gossip Girl” on their free Monday nights, because clearly that inspirational stroll through the Upper East Side was far from helpful. Amy’s design on Jonathan’s model Cerri looked like an apron I bought at Anthropologie last year. And, as you know, van der Woodsens don’t cook. Or wear that.

There are only seven designers left! Sound off now if you think the wrong designer was given the boot:

The season is at the halfway mark: We began with 16 designers, and now eight remain. Heidi announces that this challenge will put the designers "in a New York state of mind," and she instructs them to meet me in the designers' lounge. I greet them and introduce Collier Strong, consulting makeup artist for L'Oréal Paris.

For this challenge, New York City will be the point of departure. Four distinctive neighborhoods have been selected based on their history, cultural impact and influence on fashion: Chinatown, the East Village, the Upper East Side and Harlem. The designers will be working in teams of two. Each team will create two looks, one for day and one for evening. The first four names drawn from our velvet bag are the team leaders. They in turn choose their team member. In reverse order, they choose their neighborhood. (This was an attempt to be as fair and equitable as possible.)

Each team has 30 minutes to explore their neighborhood and sketch design concepts. Then, the teams meet me at Mood, where they shop with a budget of $300.

This is a one-day challenge; the designers have until midnight, plus a small amount of time in the morning. And owing to this being the L'Oréal Paris challenge, each team will have a makeup consultation with Collier during the workday.

We have two guest judges for this challenge. Francisco Costa, Women's Creative Director for Calvin Klein, sits in for Michael Kors. And we're delighted to have model and actress Molly Sims as a guest judge, too.

Team Emilio WINS! With Harlem as their neighborhood, team leader Emilio and Seth Aaron both win, a "Project Runway" first! The day look was executed by Seth Aaron, and it was all about denim: a shrunken denim jacket paired with a skinny jean. The construction of both pieces was accentuated by using gold thread. The darkness of the denim was offset by a top in a vibrant graffiti-like print, plus the look was topped off by an overscale beret in a merlot-dominated tartan. Emilio assumed control of the evening look: a full-length, spaghetti-strap, slim-fitting gown with a moderate train. Appropriately, this dress was inspired by Billie Holiday and the Cotton Club. The two looks, although distinctive on their own, had synergy and a profound resonance together on the runway. Congratulations, gentlemen!

Amy is OUT. Team leader Amy chose Jonathan to be her teammate, with the Upper East Side as their neighborhood. Once again, I took issue with many of the judges' comments. To me, the day look, executed by Amy, was well-conceived, beautifully proportioned and extremely ambitious. It was all about a 2010 version of the shirtdress, but with none of the expected austerity. Instead, it consisted of an exuberance of pleating details and was given shape by being belted with a sash. My single concern was with the palette: shades of citrus — lemon and orange. Those colors made the look appear jejune, childlike. Jonathan's superbly executed evening look was as ambitious as Amy's. He was inspired by the proliferation of wrought iron in the Upper East Side's architecture, and that was very evident in his design. He applied a chocolate organza over a café au lait stretch silk to create a slender cocktail dress. However, like the judges, I was troubled by the dress's side panels, which looked like modified godets. They made the dress appear bottom-heavy and gave the entire look an awkward proportion. As much as I hated to see anyone go home, "Project Runway" is like a game of musical chairs; by definition, someone will have to go home. In this case, it was team leader Amy, and we will dearly miss her. Remember, chacun à son goût: It's a matter of taste.

Anthony and Maya had Chinatown as their neighborhood. It was the hustle and bustle, the movement, the narrow streets and the proliferation of fire escapes that impressed them during their visit. They created a day look consisting of a shrunken kimono jacket paired with a black mini with inverted pleats lined in red. To me, it was a bit stuffy in light of the upbeat and colorful effervescence of Chinatown. The evening look was a basic, black sleeveless dress with a plunging neckline. Frankly, I was troubled by the construction details in the dress, which was executed by team leader Anthony. It had oddly placed darts at the bustline (a self-confessed pet peeve of mine), and a quasi lapel that begged for closer inspection and suffered more from that inspection. I was further troubled by what I perceived to be an uneven hem, which is unforgivable at this point in the season. But I hoped that the judges would be distracted from those matters by what was truly special about the dress: a fabric version of the art of paper folding, in this case using accordion pleats to create a honeycomb of volume. This folded and pleated detail cascaded in a sinuous manner from over the shoulder of the evening look and had the appearance of a dragon form. The judges were captivated by both looks and placed Team Anthony in the top two. Silly me for worrying!

Jay and Mila chose the East Village, where they responded to the graffiti and the rock 'n' roll grittiness of the neighborhood. Team leader Jay took charge of the day look. He created a modern jodhpur in gray wool, and used a cut-and-sew knit in black and red for a tank top. From the outset, I was concerned that the silhouette of the pant would add unwanted volume to the hips. Furthermore, constructing the pant required so much time (the pattern was very complex) that the top became almost an afterthought. Few items of apparel are as basic as a tank (it's a front and a back, really), but this one suffered from a very poor fit. Mila's evening look, however, was head-to-toe stunning. She created a jacket and miniskirt using black and white textiles (surprise!), plus a pair of red tights. The ambitiously designed and executed jacket served as the focal point. I loved the simplicity of the silhouette, including the high collar, relative to her use of the stripe details in the sleeves and bodice of the jacket. I must say that I agreed with the judges' comments about these two looks, or should I say that they agreed with me? You never know.

Next week: The designers go digital!

"Models of the Runway" definitely had a shocking ending this week, and the episode was filled with worried models as well as quite a few tears. The designers' challenge this week was to "create a look inspired by a distinct New York neighborhood," and they had to work in teams of two (which is always interesting to watch!). Amy and Jay were in the bottom two for their sloppy-looking "Upper East Side" looks, so Holly and Brittany were both concerned about their fate.

At the "Heidi Chat," Heidi noticed Valeria blushing over Seth Aaron, and also questioned Brittany and Kristina's "rock 'n' roll" symbols (supposedly meant to evoke the Lower East Side) incorporated into their poses on the runway. (I thought it looked a little odd as well, but kudos for the creativity, Kristina.) The girls were excited to hear from Heidi that they would be having makeup consultations with famed makeup artist Collier Strong, representative of L'Oréal, to get ready for a night on the town.

Everyone was excited to go out and have a few drinks, but Lorena and Brittany had to stay home since they were underage. I feel their pain! I was the ONLY underage girl on Season 1, so I had to sit at the model house all alone when all the other girls went out! While the other girls partied, Lorena and Brittany ate onion rings and hamburgers at home, but the two didn't seem too fazed by missing out on the fun.

At model elimination, Emilio surprised everyone by switching up and picking Lorena, and when it came to the final decision, Jay was in the hot seat, and was forced to choose between Holly and Brittany. All the girls (especially Cerri) were stunned when Jay chose Brittany over Holly, and the models questioned if anyone could be sure of their safety at elimination anymore! What are your thoughts? Should Jay have chosen Holly, or did he make the right choice by sticking with Brittany? And what is this DKNY drama with Valeria next week? I guess we will see … Can't wait!

xoxo,
Kalyn

Heidi sashays onto the runway to tell the eight designers who are left that they need to get into a "New York state of mind." They meet with Tim and L'Oreal makeup consultant Collier Strong to find out that the "makeup" challenge is on, as well as some other sticky details. Not only do they have to work in teams of two (again), but also their looks must be inspired by one of four New York neighborhoods: Chinatown, the East Village, the Upper East Side and Harlem. On top of all that, EACH designer must make a look — one for day and and one for evening. Confusing? Yes ... and the results show on the runway. This challenge tested the focus and tenacity of each designer to be part of a team without losing their own identity. With $300 per team and only one day to complete the challenge (I thought for sure they would get two days!), they scramble to finish some pretty crazy garments.

Teams and themes are chosen, with the first member as the leader:

Anthony and Maya / Chinatown
Amy and Jonathan / Upper East Side
Emilio and Seth / Harlem
Jay and Mila / East Village

Everyone is loving the fact that Jay and Mila got stuck with each other, since they get along like Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donnell. Everyone except Jay and Mila, that is. They head out into their neighborhoods to gain inspiration, and here is where a lot of bad decisions were made. Anthony and Maya can't get away from windows full of cheap, red and gold paper dragon party decorations. Yeah, that's what I want to wear. Maya is more smartly drawn to the architecture and fire escapes and wrought iron. Amy and Jonathan seem to have no idea what the Upper East Side is about: fashion, luxury, and the richest, most spoiled people on earth living the high life. They instead go for the inspiration of the bricks and railings. Good luck. Emilio and Seth are all about Harlem's denim looks and the Cotton Club/Billie Holiday vibe of the past. Good choice, but I hate what they did with it. Jay and Mila are getting along the best they can, and decide on the obvious graffiti/punk vibe of the East Village. This could have been the first time in reality-TV history where one person literally threw another one under the bus. They do not love each other.

My impressions of the workroom? Scattered, and it shows ... Jonathan is working on what looks like a disastrous new version of Gwyneth Paltrow's all-time Worst Dressed Oscar see-through outfit, Amy is throwing up some sort of sunset pastel maternity outfit and Mila is doing another black and white color-blocked jacket, but Seth seems to be making another cool jacket. They seem to be distracted by their makeup consultations, since they are all strapped for time. The runway day is fast approaching; this episode has the designers at their wit's end, with the least done and the most desperation and doubt about their final looks. Let's be the judge, and meet the judges:

Francisco Costa (no Michael Kors? He must be stuck in a tanning bed somewhere in Orange County), Nina Garcia and model/actress Molly Sims.

CHINATOWN

Maya (Day): Fabulous architectural jacket with angular striping details, paired with a cool black skirt with red peekaboo inserts. My winner.

Anthony (Evening): Simple black tank dress with childish paper-dragon fabric origami barfed onto the front. This piece would get you kicked out of fashion school.

EAST VILLAGE

Jay (Day): Hideous saddlebag pants that would end up on any clearance rack, paired with a tragic red and black throwaway tank top. I don't know about you, but I think saddlebags are best left on the horse.

Mila (Evening): I have figured it out!! Mila is color-blind. She made yet another black and white color-blocked jacket, with a black and white and black and white and black and white dress, and (ooooh!) red leggings. The color-blind designing for the color-blind.

UPPER EAST SIDE

Amy (Day): Now, here's a gal who is not afraid to make a fool of herself — (fish-scale pants, armpit hair-bowl jumpsuit) — and she sticks with a theme by making this pallor-inducing, jaundiced, overly pleated baggy shirt "dress" with a belt and black leggings. She is out there on a limb; I think it's about to break.

Jonathan (Evening): He goes on and on about his "techniques" as if he invented scissors. He should have learned how to use them before he made this messy mess of mesh cutouts that couldn't have been less flattering. It's almost as if he's goading the judges to throw him out.

HARLEM

Seth (Day): In one of the strangest looks I have ever seen, Seth manages to make a grown model look like a tacky Jon-Benet Ramsey–type beauty contestant in this weird denim playsuit with an even weirder hat. I felt like photos of this girl could get you in trouble with the police. Harlem? More like a runner-up at the "Little Miss Perfect" pageant.

Emilio (Evening): OK, he says he was inspired by the Cotton Club and Billie Holiday. So he made a long black, wrinkly (people who know how to sew will recognize this as an improperly fitted lining) evening gown out of cheap cotton lined with a gold fabric. Oh, and don't forget the "innovative" gold zipper up the front that makes this dress practically unwearable. Billie Holiday? What holiday? Halloween? Sorry, I hated this.

In what I consider to be the most "whack" judging in a long time, they chose Emilio and Seth to both be winners, a first in "Project Runway" history. Even after they praised Maya's outfit to the heavens, they had these two guys actually win, instead of what would have been an appropriate double elimination. Obviously, poor Amy couldn't help herself with any defense of her schleppy UES look, and got booted to Brooklyn by Heidi and the gang. Maybe they all missed Michael Kors so much they were confused ... and made really whacky decisions. I hope he's back next week ...

See ya soon,

Chris

From Disney costumes to couture, "Runaways" star Dakota Fanning is growing up — and fast. Vote on some of her most notable red-carpet looks yet.

Photos (left to right): Todd Williamson/WireImage; Jean-Paul Aussenard/WireImage; Scott Gries/Getty Images

Here at the Lifetime offices, we're very split on "Eat, Pray, Love" — both the book and the upcoming movie version. While some of us were deeply affected by the lessons we read while the author travels through Italy, India and Bali (okay, so we were going through a horrible breakup at the time), others of us found the whole thing a bit too, well, "cheesy" for our tastes.

And now the trailer for the movie — featuring a glowing Julia Roberts — has been released. And the office is as torn as ever over what we think. Some can't wait to get to the theater, while others are adamant they won't see it. Take one of our coworkers, who said, "It looks freakin' boriing and painful — aside from James Franco and Javier Bardem, and what's his name who plays the husband. Who's that?" For the record, it's dashing Mr. Billy Crudup.

Check out the trailer below and let us know what you think of the book and the movie:

He may have shut down his Twitter account, but Jesse James has now broken his silence. A day after news broke of his alleged cheating on wife Sandra Bullock, Jesse released this public statement:

"The vast majority of the allegations reported are untrue and unfounded. Beyond that, I will not dignify these private matters with any further public comment.

"There is only one person to blame for this whole situation, and that is me. It's because of my poor judgment that I deserve everything bad that is coming my way.

"This has caused my wife and kids pain and embarrassment beyond comprehension and I am extremely saddened to have brought this on them. I am truly very sorry for the grief I have caused them. I hope one day they can find it in their hearts to forgive me."

Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage

"Girls Next Door" star Holly Madison put on the (lucky) charm at O'Sheas St. Patrick's Day Celebration yesterday in Las Vegas, wearing a green, sequined bustier and skirt combo and black boots.

Photo: David Becker/Getty Images

While stars like Kristen Stewart and Dakota Fanning were dressed to perfection at "The Runaways" premiere in New York, Chloe Sevigny was wearing this.

Not only are her blazer and leather mini ill-fitting, but wearing all black is so last month.

Have something to say about this daring style? Sound off in the comment section below.

See more daring celebrity styles now!

Photo: Theo Wargo/WireImage