Love … Maybe? Sinead Stays Married, Aretha Franklin Engaged, Katy Perry & Russell Brand Divorce

Nothing Compares 2U? Sagittarius Sinead O’Connor Calls Off Divorce
It’s been 7 hours and 16 days … since Sinead O’Connor got married, filed for divorce, and then decided her fourth marriage was back on again after a night of “lovemaking.” Well, Sagittarius is the zodiac’s bachelorette, so this kind of wild behavior isn’t entirely out of character, especially since there was a total lunar eclipse in Sinead’s marriage house last month. However, there are some wellness issues here to address — and with her ruler, Jupiter, in her health house until June, we hope she tackles them. Just like her Sagittarius signmate Britney Spears, Sinead wed in Vegas and also suffers from bipolar disorder. (In fact, Sinead wed in the very same Little White Wedding Chapel where Britney got hitched in 2004.) Sinead released another bizarro statement, saying, “We decided to be boyfriend and girlfriend again and stay married.” Boyfriend and girlfriend? Or husband and wife? We’re already worried.

Scorpio Katy Perry & Gemini Russell Brand: Splitsville
We have to admit, as fun as this crazy couple seemed, we weren’t gonna bet any money on them. Gemini and Scorpio are five signs apart, which can be a karmic yet challenging match. Despite their public personas, their signs are incredibly different. Scorpio is an intense, internal Water sign and Gemini is a more detached Air sign. Scorpios may ACT a little nutty, but they have a traditional side, which Geminis are less likely to have. Unless they both got to an incredibly self-aware place — difficult, given their age and cultural differences — it could be a hard relationship to sustain. The one thing these signs may have in common is an addiction to drama and intensity (among other things; Brand is a recovered heroin and sex addict). The dizzying, “teenage dream” high of infatuation? No problem for Scorpios and Gems. But after the whirlwind courtship and eight-day Indian wedding, it may have been tough for these two drama addicts to deal with everyday life. With Jupiter in Gemini’s 12th house of endings, it’s a tough year for Brand, one that might bring up a lot of old baggage between now and June. Don’t expect to see him out and about, unless he’s engaging in some old self-destructive behavior … which we hope he doesn’t. (Head to the ashram, Russell.) Jupiter visiting Katy’s marriage house may have made her second-guess her relationship. There may even be a new guy waiting in the wings. Still, given the way these two signs operate, we wouldn’t be shocked if they pulled a Sinead and reunited.

Aretha Franklin (Aries) Is Engaged
And in other marital news, Aries Aretha Franklin is engaged to longtime Capricorn love Willie Wilkerson (both from our hometown of Detroit — shout-out to the D!). We actually like this pairing of signs. Aries is the star, while Capricorn is the quiet rock who holds the space for Aries to shine, and doesn’t mind taking a quieter background role. As an Earth sign, he no doubt makes her feel like a (yup) natural woman. With Saturn finishing up a three-year journey through Aretha’s marriage house in October 2012, she’s been preparing for her next serious commitment. Looks like this is it. They may still take their time to walk down the aisle, though, since Saturn likes to take it slow. Mazel tov, Aretha!

Taurus Carnie Wilson Struggles With Addictive Behavior
Singer Carnie Wilson is talking to the press about her weight and struggles with addiction. With expansive Jupiter in Taurus until June 2012, she’s no doubt feeling the urge to reinvent her life. Interestingly, the last time Jupiter was in Taurus (in 1999), Carnie underwent gastric bypass surgery and lost 150 pounds. Now she’s gained back some of it, citing stress-related overeating and “addictive and compulsive behaviors.” Taurus is a sensual Earth sign, and is definitely one that’s prone to self-soothing through food, drink and even drugs. This sign definitely doesn’t do things halfway — they’re either exercising and following a strict diet, or completely indulging (Janet Jackson and Renée Zellweger are two Taurus examples). Taurus women can be naturally stocky, and we’d frankly love to see Carnie embrace and accept her body through thick and thin. Contrary to what many people think, gastric bypass surgery isn’t a miracle cure, and some who’ve had the surgery do gain back the weight. Hopefully this time around, Carnie will find more balance in her life, and as a result her body will find its natural equilibrium — whatever that weight may be.